When you find out you are pregnant, people seem to always give the same basic advice. One of those is the old saying "Parenthood doesn't come with a manual" type thing. So I got that. Really. I mean I realize that no one really knows what they are doing because it's a job that you have never had. Every parent is different. Every child is different. The only 'experience' I have is what I have learned from my mother. (Secretly I have always thought my mom had the manual on raising children down pat because she always seemed to know what do to.) Being a mom has taught me one thing. I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT I'M DOING! Apparently neither did my mother, but she made me think she did.
Being a stay at home mom is a completely different problem too. I know the word 'problem' sounds bad. In all seriousness, I honestly feel that way some times. I have moments when I love my little boys & other moments when I think my head might explode at any second. I know that being a working mom was easier. I have been staying at home with the boys full time for around 8 months. In that time, I haven't figured out how to make it work. A good day means everyone has a bath and ate something. I still have tons of clutter all over my house. The sink always has dirty dishes. I'm fairly certain the laundry is multiplying like rabbits. I feel like I'm drowning in a life that I can't get control of. I don't know if any other moms out there feel it too, but I'm sure they are out there some where.
I have made it my goal to get out of the hole! I did some research online and was able to locate some wonderful sources of help. Part one: Develop a schedule. I will be the first person to admit that we have no set schedule. Also I should probably give my dear husband credit....he did suggest such a thing a while back. I didn't fully agree with him at the time. To me a schedule means a set time for everything. When I was working, I could figure out breaks and lunch time. I knew exactly how long I had to do everything. Nothing is the same with children. Neither Lane nor Jacob get up at the same time everyday. I don't either. I let Jacob be my alarm clock. When he wakes me up talking or crying, I know it's time to get up and feed him. I really do better when I manage to get up before him. I haven't made it a point to adopt such behavior because I am not a morning person. Actually I hate mornings. Never getting up with an alarm was the thing I was most excited about in my journey as a stay at mom. I did a dance I was so excited. No more mornings that started before 8 am for me! Woot! For the most part, that goal has worked out. However, I have come to the conclusion that this is no longer functioning well for my family. I think we would all benefit from a better guided day. It's harder with my husband's work hours. He works second shift so he's still asleep when we are getting up and going for the day. His breakfast time is usually coming around about the time the boys and I are getting ready for lunch. I'm not really sure how to make the best schedule for all of us. I'm just going to start by writting out a basic timeline guide. I'll pencil-in corrections or suggestions thoughout the day for the first few days. I believe that will help me iron out any problems that are sure to come up. After the first week, I will evaluate the schedule. Assuming this will be enough time to develop a well thought out plan of attack, I hope to put it into practice.
Part Two: Clear out the clutter! I'm not even going to attempt to tackle this goal until we successfully incorporate the schedule. The best motivation is little successes! I'm leaving this one for another post.
I hope I am able to get something going soon that works for us. I'm overwhelmed with everything right now. I think I can do it! I have to keep telling myself that instead of screaming my head off. Stress can be good motivation. Thanks for listening my peeps!
-Lakin
